This section on “Dangers of pre-marital sex for boys,” and “Preventing pre-marital sex” was prepared by Mrs. Joyce Adeola Olufemi, a retired well respected principal under Oyo state civil service commission, Oyo state-Nigeria. Most of the materials penned down here are used with her permission.


Boys usually think pre-marital sex is fun and Conquest (I have conquered her) because they do not and cannot get pregnant like the girls. They feel that since they cannot get pregnant they are not at the receiving end, they can therefore sow their ‘wild oats.’ However, unwanted pregnancy is not the only danger that can occur from pre-marital sex. There are both physical and spiritual dangers. There are even emotional and psychological dangers. The unwanted pregnancy they think does not affect them can and even has a myriad of boomerang effects on them in future.


Physical dangers/Emotional/Psychological dangers for Boys

(1) There is the danger of being affected by diseases. There are sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) like Gonorrhoea, Syphillis and even HIV/AIDS. The makers of condom even advertise that it is not 100% proof security. Abstinence is still the best way to prevent or avoid infection. These STDs can lead to infertility even in males. The boy may develop low sperm count or weak sperm.

(2) The unwanted pregnancy which resulted from his sin of fornication can also abort the boy’s dream or destiny. Unprepared for parenthood can be forced on him.

(3)  Lack of concentration on the boy’s studies. There is no way a boy will not be thinking about his girlfriend even in the classroom while the teachers are teaching him. The time he is supposed to be reading, he will be thinking of his next escapade or the one he had last.

(4)  Pre-marital sex can even lead a boy to steal so as to please his partner or to woo her.

(5) The boy’s physical beauty or handsomeness wanes or deteriorates because of his sexual activities.

(6) Guilt: You will be consumed by guilt. Guilty feelings will not allow you to have peace of mind, and when you lack peace you will not be able to focus on your studies.

(7) Pre-marital sex will lead to loss of love and trust between you and your girl-friend. What you think you are expressing during such acts is not love but lust. After sometime you get fed up with her, you don’t trust her again and you start looking for new catches, i.e. new girls to waste their future for them.

(8) Another effect is inability to keep your marriage when you eventually get married, because you have been joined to very many girls.

Spiritual dangers

  • The danger of Soul-ties: Sex is not only a physical activity, it is a spiritual activity as well. That is why God says, the husband shall be joined to the wife and they will be one They are no longer two but one.  The lady becomes your soul partner. If you decide to have sex with several partners, (girls), how many soul partners do you want to have? Into how many ways do you want to distribute yourself?
  • Truncated destiny/stolen glory: Many or some girls are possessed with water spirits and other demons. Having sex with them can rob you of your glory. It can abort your destiny. Many men have become unsuccessful and directionless in life because their glory has been ‘stolen’ as a youth through pre-marital sex with such evil possessed girls.
  • Inability to keep a home: Some men have been unable to keep homes because such demon possessed girls cause quarrels, fights and lack of understanding between them and their wives. Water spirits are particularly jealous spirits.

Inability to be fruitful: Such demons may even prevent pregnancies in the man’s marriage.